Who wouldn’t want to be spoiled and provided for? Not in a lazy, demanding way, but in a loving, giving marriage. I love being a traditional housewife because I love being protected and provided for.
My husband read me a quote the other day. Unfortunately I have no clue who to give credit to:
“Women worry about the future until they get married. Men worry about the future only when they get married.”
This quote hit the nail on the head for us! No truer words!
I was single until I was 27 years old. Which, in my culture, is old maid status where only widowers and creepy bachelors will be available.
From the time I was a young teen, I worried about the future. What job I would I get? How would I support myself? And most importantly, would I get married? How many babies would I be able to have? Where would I live?
My husband (and several other guys I’ve talked to) wasn’t worried a bit about the future. Sure, they wondered if they’d get married, but they didn’t obsess about it like girls tend to.
When we got engaged, my husband started stashing away the money and worrying about all things future. And I forgot about my future worries and started dreaming of marriage and babies.
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Men & Women are not Equal
No matter what feminists loudly and proudly proclaim, men and women are different! Our brains are different. Our bodies are different. Our physical abilities are different. Our emotions are different.
Doubt me? Just compare our hormone profiles!
We are both valuable. We are both on the same team. And not everyone on the team can be the quarterback. Not everyone on the team can be the star hitter. In order for the leading role to be successful, they need lots of support. They need someone to protect them. They need someone to pass them the ball with a beautiful arch.
My husband is the leader. The protector. The provider. If I try to become those things, I become my husband’s competition, not his teammate. My role is his helper. His role is my protector.
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And I believe that’s exactly how God designed us on purpose. Different, yet both valuable in bringing their strengths to the table.
As long as we both submit to the roles God designed us for, we have a beautiful relationship.
My extra hormones are what helped me bond with our baby and get up every three hours to feed him. It helps me snuggle him even if he is crying and screaming for no reason.
My husband’s physical strength and drive helps him through the workday. His mental strength helps him navigate countless conflicts and then forget about them in an hour.
What Being a Traditional Housewife Looks Like
What it ISN’T
- It doesn’t mean I’m lazy.
- It doesn’t mean I get to go out to coffee with friends every day.
- It doesn’t mean I get to spend frivolously.
- It doesn’t mean I sleep in every day.
- It doesn’t mean I go around in my robe all day.
- It doesn’t mean we eat take-out every night.
What Being a Traditional Housewife IS
Being a traditional housewife means I am my husband’s helper. It means I do everything I can to set me husband up for success. Instead of getting paid to make my boss look good, I get love and give love to make my “boss” look good.
- It means I keep our house clean and running smoothly while he is gone.
- It means I get to meet up with friends occasionally and be an encouragement to others.
- It means I carefully shop sales, mend clothing and conserve to save money.
- It means I get up and make the bed and get breakfast on the table to start my husband’s day off right.
- It means I get up and get dressed to let my husband know I’m proud to be his wife.
- It means I make nourishing meals from scratch to save money and satisfy my husband’s hunger.
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Being a Traditional Housewife Provides Freedom
As women, we tend to over-analyze everything. And carry grudges. And nit-pick. Working at jobs with many other co-workers was exhausting for me because there was always drama and backstabbing.
Many times I carried silly work conflicts home and into the next day even. My personality doesn’t easily breeze over conflict.
Now that I’m out of that environment, my brain is free and I don’t dread going to work every day. My husband is much better at dealing with conflict and letting it go. He’ll confront and then move on.
Also, not having to worry about pleasing some boss that doesn’t care about my personal dreams and aspirations allows my creativity to flow.
I can pursue hobbies and dreams that I wouldn’t otherwise have time for. As long as they are not dishonoring to my husband or family.
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Pre-set Expectations Relieve Stress
As a traditional housewife, my husband knows he can count on good, home cooked, timely meals. He can count on clean underwear and socks folded on his shelf. He can count on a clean house.
My husband isn’t at his job all day wondering if there will be dinner tonight or if he will have to do a load of laundry or if he will have to give the kids baths, or clean up a messy kitchen.
In the security of our expectations for each other, we can have a great relationship without this added stress of wondering who will do what tonight or if there will be supper.
Keeping our grocery budget under control is part of my job, too. Grab Crystal’s Slash Your Grocery Bill to hone in on your spending!
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The Exceptions
No matter how perfect of a homemaker you are, there will be days that nothing gets done.
That’s okay!
And my husband can pick up the loose pieces of cooking, child care and cleaning when I need him to. He also gives me grace to look past piles of unfolded laundry and dirty bathrooms.
Recently I was horribly sick for a few days. My husband took our son to a friend’s for coffee and played outside with him to allow me to rest. He came home with chicken noodle soup.
On the flip side, he knows he can call me for help, too. I’ll drive tractor, run for parts, deliver seed and feed calves when days are crazy for him.
I love helping my husband out with his work on the farm. I love when my husband helps me out with my home responsibilities. But what makes us work is that we each are clear about our expectations of each other and know (relatively) what each day will bring.
Being a traditional housewife is a dream come true for me!
